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Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Binkys and Boppys and Boosters, Oh My!

(Jeopardy theme)

Our first category, Baby items that Start with the letter "B".  For $200, Use this for comfortable breast feedings....(buzzzzzz), "What is a Boppy pillow?"  ding ding ding, "Correct!"

Have you stopped to think about how many baby items start with the letter "B"?  There's Bibs, Bottles, Blankets, Bassinets, Burp Cloths, Bedding, Bathtubs, Boppy's, Binky's, Bumbo, Bouncers, Boosters, and Baskets.  Come on Marketing people!!  There's more letter's in the alphabet than B!  What in the WORLD is a Binky anyways?  I have a few stories about our quest for the perfect baby items.  (I think Hot Mama is getting me back for the times I make her wait at Bass Pro when I'm trying to decide on Green Pumkin with the Red flake or Watermelon seed Strike King tubes or lizards...I mean the most subtle difference in color could be the difference in no fish or a 9 pounder...this is serious stuff!)

We were off to JC Penny one beautiful Saturday morning to buy bedding for the normal bed that we are keeping in the baby's room and some drapes for the winder.  I just love it when you go to the store and I really don't want to be there and try to get help from an associate who also...doesn't want to be there!  Hot Mama and I are looking for a plain blue bedspread...I know you are thinking Piece of CAKE, right?  Nah uh...WRONG!  I find an associate walking down the aisle of the bedding area in Penny's and ask, "hey, can you tell me where I can find a solid blue bedspread or the like?"  Without even stopping, she walks right on by us (throws her hand up in the air in a brush us off kinda way) and says, "You gots to buy them solid colors offline".....she never turned around to even look at us.  Hot Mama and I just stared at each other in utter shock!  Did that just happen?  She didn't even ask me if I wanted fries with that?  Not to mention I am totally confused at how you buy something offline?  I'm assuming she meant "off the internet."  Meanwhile, as Hot Mama is wanting to meet with the store manager, I recommend going to Dillards, they surely have some solid color bed spreads! 

Walking over to Dillards Hot Mama hands me the lime green and pink bag that we brought to carry the baby bedding so we can match the color to the bed spread we were hoping to buy.  We get over to the bedding section at Dillards and Hot Mama goes to looking around, and I wander off to find an associate to help.  I come across one of the associates and he was a, shall I say, feminine guy.  Remember the lime green and pink bag we had....yep, I was still carrying it.  The associate looks at the bag, looks back up at me, smiles really big, and asks, "How can I help you?"  "Yeah, my wife and I are looking for a solid blue bedspread, whatcha got?"  Meanwhile Hot Mama comes on over by me and starts being more specific about what we were looking for.  This guy bent over backwards....wait, maybe I should say, this guy was VERY helpful in looking for what we wanted, but again we came up short....strike 2!  I think this associate said it best, "It's hard to find solid colors any more in the stores because they are always so 'matchy matchy' with pick out a bedspread and you can get 'matchy matchy' with the towels and the sheets and lawd, even the dishes are 'matchy matchy.'"  Here Hot Mama and I are again, looking at each other, wondering if we should laugh, or we just decided to head on to Belk.  Kudos to you Mr. Dillards associate for going out of your way to help us find what we were looking the way, do you know the chick at Penny's?  You should give her some pointers!

Off to Belk we go!  After no help, we find a blanket that worked, so we bought it and split....dropped back by Penny's found the drapes we had already picked out and walked ALL the way around the store to find someone to check us out.  By this time, lets just get this crap and get outta here....ever felt that way?  I am glad that no one walked by that had a Manager badge on....I think Hot Mama may have gone "pregnant" on them!

By the way, my advice, don't go shopping for something specific...ya ain't gonna find it!

A couple weekends before we were out looking for that baby bedding and let me tell ya, there is NO such thing as a perfect baby bedding!  I would say I liked something and Hot Mama didn't like the colors....She'd say she liked something and I'd say I didn't like the took about 3 times of this happening for me to get smart and when she found something she liked, I said, "Honey, that looks great!" with a big smile on my face, because ultimately, it didn't matter to me what it was....I went from being somewhat picky to as long as it ain't pink....We had an associate there come to help us with our big decision of the baby bedding.  It was obvious to me at this point that if it wasn't perfect, the world may stop spinning, so I was in total agreement mode!  This associate goes into telling us we can do "custom" bedding and get it exactly as we want it!  WOOHOO (insert angelic ahhhhhhhh sound)  So, we are both smart enough to know that the $100-$200 baby bedding sets we were looking at were going to be more expensive if we went custom, but we were not prepared for the $800 quote she gave us.  That's the fastest I had seen Hot Mama get up outta her chair in a while!  HA  $800....seriously?  I'm sure people pay that for baby stuff and if you did, I am not condemning you, but lawd...Eight Hundred Smackers?  Believe it or not, this ended our day shopping for the baby bedding...

We found something "offline" on BabiesRUs for well under the $800 mark...and she's happy!  I love it when Hot Mama is happy and I love to admit, she's that way 99.9% of the time!  (I'll leave out the part where we ordered 3 different set before we got one we liked...but we were making a statement!  Honey, What was that statement again?)

I have to take a moment to talk her up really high now, because several weeks earlier she had done the most loving thing a pregnant woman could ever do to a man that really doesn't want to do the baby shopping thing....she told me that she and her sister were going to go register at the baby registries and I could take that day and go fishing if I wanted.  Man, I love that woman!  I was really dreading doing that registry thing!  Great thing is, we always do that for each other and that has made our relationship top notch.  I truly believe if each spouse puts the other ahead of themselves, and really does that, marriage is just that much easier.  Now throw this new baby in the mix...(insert whistling of a bomb and explosion).  Yeahhhhh I guess we'll have to make a few adjustments, right, all you parents out there? 

Another moment for all of you that have been so generous to help us with the Bibs, Bottles, Blankets, Bassinets, Burp Cloths, Bedding, Bathtubs, Boppy's, Binky's, Bumbo, Bouncers, Boosters, and Baskets for the baby, it is truly appreciated and I hope we can return the gift to you in some way, and I promise it won't be dirty diapers!  Thanks to all my friends!

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